I've always been told that I like to argue. Most of the people that have told me that haven't ever cared to actually understand me. With most of their comments they have communicated to me that I'm frustrating and that I'm a problem. Once some one told me "You know what your problem is Daniel?" At this point we had been discussing predestination and I was exploring calvinism and arminianism so I wasn't really sure how my problems related. I think it was rhetorical any way so I waited for the finish of this unexpected interruption to the conversation. "You never pick a side. You always just want to argue." I can't remember what my response was but I think it was something like, "oh". I was hurt. But it was at this point I realized what they had been saying to me all this time. Which lead me to explore my own communication and what was I trying to tell people about myself.
I bring this up because after my last few post I realized that people were listening. Which is great! but I don't want people thinking that I am solely set out on arguing with every idea. I want to explore every idea and some time that means poking holes in ideas and questioning them. I want to communicate with people so that I can keep my own ideas accountable. It's not about agreeing on everything it's about being able to talk about everything.
I also wanted to say to you all right now as gently as I can that if you ever just wright "You're wrong" I will make you explain yourself but only because I love you and want to make sure you know why I'm wrong. If you don't know why I'm wrong then I will help you come up with an answer. I had a conversation like this out side of the blog where I ended up proving my self wrong with no help from the person I was talking to but it help me understand my own ideas so I was great-full for the one sided conversation either way.
To me ideas are something we must all be questioning/exploring all of the time with each other. Even if we come to the same conclusion every time we talk. Biblically we are commanded to remind each other about the salvation of Jesus which means we must be exploring that idea. Not just knowing it and moving on. Ideas are important and working them out is important as well. I have had a so many bad ideas that when I worked them out with other people turned into great ideas. No one ever agrees with all or any of my ideas but my friends are willing to listen and question with me.
If any of you do know me you know that I do argue. I've realized that when I argue it is to win. I like to win when people look down on me. It's pride that compels me to do it and so I have been repenting of that. It's a work in progress.
And Finely
Communication is something deeper than talking. I feel like sometimes talking is a way of putting distance between my self and the people I'm with. A conversation can lead people away from what might actually be going on around me. "How are you doing?" me:"Good!" with a smile. I can say that any time even when I'm not. Arguing is another way people think they communicate. Communicating to me, however, is something more beautiful than a well structured idea or a flowery conversation, it is the heart of what we all want. Communication to me is uniting with others in a deeper way than we were before we communicated... it's learning about each other and and understanding each other. "Listening" is the fancy word people use I think. Learn, listen and with love it is completed.
Another day, another ramble. Thank you all for listening : )
Sunday, January 27, 2013
Thursday, January 10, 2013
"I Don't Know. Get Married." ~Tyler D.
What's right, what's wrong and what's religious?
Once upon a time a man went around giving little slips of paper out. If you bought one from him you could get out of purgatory. Was it right to do that? How did we figure out if it was wrong?
I ask the question treading on some very odd territory for myself. I have always believed in the institution of marriage. However, now that it has been so nailed down as a religious act I have started to wonder why non-Christians do it. Is it right for non-believers to marry? What does it even mean to marry? And finally, the question that I struggle the most with is this: If a boy and a girl love each other and make that known to others, commit to being with each other forever and consimate that love are they living in sin? That is, are they sinning if they never get it down on paper or kiss in a chapel?
This thought exists in my mind because more and more people are choosing this option. They have given up on the institution of marriage. Their parents got married and they got divorced in record numbers.. I laugh when religious institutions say they are trying to defend marriages from homosexuals. They obviously don't seem to think about the fact that divorces in the "Christian nation" has already destroyed the practice. Marriage, in it's current form, has lost. It's a casualty of our un-Christian and crappy-Christian culture.
So I ask. Is it wrong. If you celebrate Christmas all year long but not on December 25 is it sin? Maybe you are just sick of all the fuss made over it? Think about it. White dress: $500-$4,000. Suits: $100-$1,000. Venue:$1,000-10,000. Photographer: $200-$8,000. anywhere from 6 months to years of planning. The wedding industry is great for the economy but is it really good for us? I'm starting to wonder..
My friend has been talking to me about his girlfriend and how he is committed to not marring her. But he doesn't seem to be a flake or uncommitted to her. He just hates marriage and in a world that is completely un-committed to the act I don't think he always sees the benefits. I definitely don't always see them in the world. I will say that I do see them in my own marriage and I love being married but I don't like what we have done to this thing called marriage. It's a sad joke it seems and our children are the ones suffering for it.
I will say this with conviction: Divorce is and will always be wrong. In the case of abuse or cheating it is necessary but it is still wrong. NECESSARY! but sadly wrong.
So what is marriage? After you take away all of the religious practices? (Which I like ceremonies so don't get me wrong.) It is pure and simple. Marriage is when a man leaves his past behind and becomes one with his wife. Oddly the wife comes before the marriage (Gen 2:24). I like the idea though. My wife was always my wife, I just finally caught up with her and committed.
So as you all can see I have confused and scattered ideas on the whole thing. Let me know what you think. And, for now, if you have a friend as I do who isn't married to his wife maybe stop condemning him for it and instead encourage him to be faithful and committed to her. Who knows, they might be better off than your some-day-divorced friends.
Seriously though. Call me out. I realize I'm pushing some boundaries. Or just comment. With the divorce rate where it is this topic deserves some thought.
Reference
www.psychologytoday.com/basics/marriage
The quote in the title is from Fight Club the movie.
Listening to "It's All Understood" by Jack Johnson
Once upon a time a man went around giving little slips of paper out. If you bought one from him you could get out of purgatory. Was it right to do that? How did we figure out if it was wrong?
I ask the question treading on some very odd territory for myself. I have always believed in the institution of marriage. However, now that it has been so nailed down as a religious act I have started to wonder why non-Christians do it. Is it right for non-believers to marry? What does it even mean to marry? And finally, the question that I struggle the most with is this: If a boy and a girl love each other and make that known to others, commit to being with each other forever and consimate that love are they living in sin? That is, are they sinning if they never get it down on paper or kiss in a chapel?
This thought exists in my mind because more and more people are choosing this option. They have given up on the institution of marriage. Their parents got married and they got divorced in record numbers.. I laugh when religious institutions say they are trying to defend marriages from homosexuals. They obviously don't seem to think about the fact that divorces in the "Christian nation" has already destroyed the practice. Marriage, in it's current form, has lost. It's a casualty of our un-Christian and crappy-Christian culture.
So I ask. Is it wrong. If you celebrate Christmas all year long but not on December 25 is it sin? Maybe you are just sick of all the fuss made over it? Think about it. White dress: $500-$4,000. Suits: $100-$1,000. Venue:$1,000-10,000. Photographer: $200-$8,000. anywhere from 6 months to years of planning. The wedding industry is great for the economy but is it really good for us? I'm starting to wonder..
My friend has been talking to me about his girlfriend and how he is committed to not marring her. But he doesn't seem to be a flake or uncommitted to her. He just hates marriage and in a world that is completely un-committed to the act I don't think he always sees the benefits. I definitely don't always see them in the world. I will say that I do see them in my own marriage and I love being married but I don't like what we have done to this thing called marriage. It's a sad joke it seems and our children are the ones suffering for it.
I will say this with conviction: Divorce is and will always be wrong. In the case of abuse or cheating it is necessary but it is still wrong. NECESSARY! but sadly wrong.
So what is marriage? After you take away all of the religious practices? (Which I like ceremonies so don't get me wrong.) It is pure and simple. Marriage is when a man leaves his past behind and becomes one with his wife. Oddly the wife comes before the marriage (Gen 2:24). I like the idea though. My wife was always my wife, I just finally caught up with her and committed.
So as you all can see I have confused and scattered ideas on the whole thing. Let me know what you think. And, for now, if you have a friend as I do who isn't married to his wife maybe stop condemning him for it and instead encourage him to be faithful and committed to her. Who knows, they might be better off than your some-day-divorced friends.
Seriously though. Call me out. I realize I'm pushing some boundaries. Or just comment. With the divorce rate where it is this topic deserves some thought.
Reference
www.psychologytoday.com/basics/marriage
The quote in the title is from Fight Club the movie.
Listening to "It's All Understood" by Jack Johnson
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
Go to Church
But why?
Why do we go to the churches we go to? Is it a comfort thing? Some people say that the church that they go to is really following God and that's why they go. But is it? At your core why are you going? This is purely a question. Philosophy may be your answer but if it is or if it isn't imagine if all of the "Christian" churches had the exact same philosophy. Would you still go to the church your in. Why or why not?
The reason I ask is because I was at an aged church the other night and couldn't help notice the love and longing for each other and the Lord. It was good to be there. At the same time I wondered if any of my younger friends would gravitate there based on that or if all the wrinkles and gray hair and o2 tanks would bore them off.
I continue to ask how this "church" thing works and I want to know what you think. Please don't just read this. Help me explore our hearts and this movement called "church".
Rules for posting: Don't just tell me how it is. Tell me how it is with you. I could tell you all of those "young hipster" love to go to Mars Hill because it "cool" but that doesn't help the conversation nor is it edifying.
Why do we go to the churches we go to? Is it a comfort thing? Some people say that the church that they go to is really following God and that's why they go. But is it? At your core why are you going? This is purely a question. Philosophy may be your answer but if it is or if it isn't imagine if all of the "Christian" churches had the exact same philosophy. Would you still go to the church your in. Why or why not?
The reason I ask is because I was at an aged church the other night and couldn't help notice the love and longing for each other and the Lord. It was good to be there. At the same time I wondered if any of my younger friends would gravitate there based on that or if all the wrinkles and gray hair and o2 tanks would bore them off.
I continue to ask how this "church" thing works and I want to know what you think. Please don't just read this. Help me explore our hearts and this movement called "church".
Rules for posting: Don't just tell me how it is. Tell me how it is with you. I could tell you all of those "young hipster" love to go to Mars Hill because it "cool" but that doesn't help the conversation nor is it edifying.
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
Who are We?
It's impossible to go a day without being offended it seems. It's socially unacceptable to be vocal about your religious views... and it's getting old. The dark days are over people. Science isn't enlightenment, most of the time it isn't even facts its theory. Yet there are two types of Christians out there today: ones that believe in fairy tails and ones that are smarter than that, and they both suck. At least we are united in that... that we suck. Honestly I don't care what your religious views are if you see poverty and turn your head the other way you suck and so does your philosophy. Not my best post ever but this is what has been bothering me today. I happen to be a fairy tail believing Christian. Why? Because I don't give a shit about the age of the earth. I can't go back and do anything about it and in the end what matters is where we put our trust. Chances are if you live in America and you are reading this your god is money, your intelligence, your leisure and then maybe God. If that's the case I don't care how old the earth is to you. I don't want to be like you. I believe in God and that's it.
As for us, what does it mater what we believe if we have no convictions? Do we believe in whatever we want so we don't have to have convictions? 16,000 kids died today of starvation and there wont be a candle-lite service. There wont be 16,000 shots into the air as a tribute to them. The media won't interview there parents. this is it for them. A cold night sky and the press of the dirt floor as they slip into the great beyond. How old is the earth any way?
As for us, what does it mater what we believe if we have no convictions? Do we believe in whatever we want so we don't have to have convictions? 16,000 kids died today of starvation and there wont be a candle-lite service. There wont be 16,000 shots into the air as a tribute to them. The media won't interview there parents. this is it for them. A cold night sky and the press of the dirt floor as they slip into the great beyond. How old is the earth any way?
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